"Never Say Die" . . . Living with Lung Cancer

A chronicle of my journey with lung cancer. I'll share what I feel and learn along the way ~ hoping it will help my fellow travelers make their way down this rocky road that no one wants to take.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Sorry it's been so long . . .

You may have been wondering what happened to me. If you were worried, I'm sorry. As they say, life happens!

As a brief recap . . .

The holidays were lovely with lots of time spent with family.

In January, we adopted a new member into our family. Her name is Daisy and she's a 3 year-old mixed breed. She looks mostly like a pit bull with a setter tail. LOL I was a little concerned about her pit bull heritage but she's extremely affectionate and loving . . . not at all aggressive unless you happen to be a chipmunk, squirrel, or a downspout where a chipmunk may be hiding! She and Casey get along well and he's happy to have a companion again. He was quite mopey after we lost Chessie.

February brought the unwanted news that the tumors had begun to grow again. Then, I had just begun on a new drug regimen in March when they discovered I had developed a brain tumor in the right frontal lobe. That required a series of 15 radiation treatments given daily except on weekends and the temporary cessation of chemo. I was really astounded at how debilitating radiation turned out to be. My oncologist told me it would make me exhausted and that's why I couldn't continue the IV chemo during the treatments but I had no idea just HOW bad it would be. I lost all strength in my legs and really had a hard time walking. Either the treatment or the weakness affected my equilibrium and eyesight. Of course, I lost all of my hair again - but this time only on my head. It was a scary and unpleasant ordeal to say the least. However, at least they were able to treat the tumor and that's a lot to be grateful for.

The downside of this is that my oncologist says my brain will never be the same again. At times I have a lot of trouble collecting my thoughts and there are many times when I can't think of the words I want to use. No one can say how much of this will be permanent. I have to admit I hate being a "dullard" but I suppose there are worse things. ; ) One of them is the fact that since one tumor has metastasized to the brain, I may get others. : ( But, like everything else concerning this disease, we'll just have to wait and see and always hope for the best.

In April, I started on an oral chemo where I just take a pill a day with no IV treatments. This is supposed to be easier on my body that the latter. However, it has a really negative effect on my digestive system and I find it very hard to eat. Unlike the infusion chemo, this is fed into your body every day and you never get a break from it . . . with the other, there are days when you don't have to worry about side effects. But . . . if it works, I guess I won't complain. I'll be having scans and an MRI at the end of June to find out if the radiation and this new medication have been effective. Please pray for a good outcome!

My family has been my salvation through all of this. I don't know what I would have done without them. They've waited on me, forced me to walk when I didn't want to, kept my spirits up and have just generally been my guardian angels. I thank them with all my heart.

Many of you havc also served as my personal angels with your cards, emails and calls. I can't thank you enough for your care and concern. It's all helped so much! I will never forget your kindness.

And finally . . .

I have scads more to tell you about but not enough energy to do it today. I have a new laptop which makes it easier for me to communicate with you so I hope to be around a lot more.

'til next time . . . You're all in my thoughts and prayers.

5 Comments:

  • At 6/09/2008, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I had read your last posts and was very happy to find your words again this month, after such a long time. My husband has lung cancer like you and I always read your words and they help me keep the dark thoughts away. We'll be praying for you here in Portugal.

     
  • At 6/10/2008, Blogger Linda said…

    Hi Portugal!

    Thanks so much for your note! I'm sorry your husband is also afflicted with this disease but I hope his treatment is effective and he's doing well.

    If my words help you to stay positive. I'm really happy. It's just as important for you to remain upbeat if you want to help your husband. I know those "dark thoughts" have a way of trying to sneak in when you least expect them but they don't have nearly as much power as laughter and positive thinking. : )

    Thanks again for reading and for your prayers . . . both are much appreciated. You and your husband will also be in my thoughts and prayers.

    Linda

     
  • At 2/22/2009, Blogger suzross said…

    Dear Linda,
    You are such an inspiration, and your beautiful spirit shines through in your writing. I am going to Tecumseh to take care of our friend Bonnie next week. She has hospice care, she is bedbound and very weak. Please keep her in your prayers so she may find the peace you have found. My thoughts and prayers are with you, childhood friend.
    Suzette

     
  • At 5/12/2009, Blogger Linda said…

    This is Linda's daughter, Jennie. I'm trying to figure out her password so I can give an update. I'm also trying to reach her friends, so if you could send me your phone number or other contact information, that would be great. You can send to jcelacks@gmail.com

     
  • At 6/29/2022, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I am seeing posts for the first time, after recently learning of Linda’s passing!
    I was so saddened to
    Learn as I had no idea she was I’ll, she never related that to me. We were best friends when we shared our military lives and our two kids, divorces, moves apart and remarriages, step children Every Christmas we sent cards with how our kids were and where they were. Grandchildren and dogs! (In her perfect handwriting) Along with phone calls and I visited in Roscommon once. Then nothing and I always wondered. And I feel empty. And sad. Love. And sadness!
    Her friend Gerry Berry (Carrera. )
    Allavan@aol.com

     

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